Let me start by saying this year was my third attempt at trying to finish this book. The first time I made it through the first 3 lessons and that was enough to get me going to lose that 30 lbs I lost in 2010/2011. But it wasn’t enough to keep it off. At the beginning of 2015, I began a new habit of practicing the Miracle Mornings routine which allowed me the time to work through the exercises in this book and really think about what they meant to my life. Finally, I was able to get back to this book for the third and final time and I made it all the way through.
In short the book’s message is this:
You are overweight because you use food to cope with your fears. Instead, turn to God and let his love support you through this journey and fill up your heart so that there is no room for fear.
That is a big statement admittedly and the book does a good job of breaking it down for you and more importantly breaking you down – which is why it’s a very hard book to read. Reading this book and doing the exercises in the book means that you are exposing yourself to the rawest form and really attacking the problems that have plagued you your whole life.
Why do you overeat?
What are you afraid of?
This is what you will figure out when you read this book and do what it asks you to do.
My favorite line in the book is when Marianne says, reading this is not the beginning of the end but if you do the work and really believe in the possibility of a miracle, this could be the end of the beginning.
How many times have we “started over” with our weight loss journey. How many times have we admitted failure and then went to a new plan and begun anew. How many times have we hoped that this time would be the last time we would “begin again”. I pray and I hope that she is right, that this is the last time that I begin again. This time I will stick to it to the end, maintain my weight loss and begin my new life as a thinner, calmer, healthier person, physically but more importantly emotionally. I hope that this is the end of the beginning.
I see many posts coming in the future where I will divulge all of the lessons I learned and how I came to the conclusions that I did. But today I will share what I figured out about my fears. In one of the last exercises of the book Marianne Williamson asks you to write a list of things you are afraid of happening if you actually lose the weight. See my list below.
All The Things That Scare Me About Being Thin:
- I’m afraid that people (my mother!) will speak about it as if its temporary.
- I’m afraid I’ll believe this about myself as well
- I’m afraid of those initial looks and comments – I love them and I hate them – if that’s possible
- I’m afraid I’ll have nothing to obsess over if I no longer have a weight problem – it’s like the weight loss battle is part of my identity – who am I if I’m not “the girl who is always trying to lose weight”
- I’m afraid of losing all my excuses for why I can’t be more social – I’m always claiming that it will never mess up my diet or that I need to exercise instead. Losing weight will mean no more excuses for not being more social.
- I’m afraid of all the free time I’ll have which will justify me finally having to go through with my other dreams. They won’t be on hold anymore. I keep saying – I’ll work on this goal once I finish losing weight”. or “I’m trying to lose weight so I don’t have time for that but once I lose weight I’ll really focus on that – finally. If I lose weight I lose that excuse – and that terrifies me. I will actually have to chase my dreams.
You must read this book but more importantly you must do the work that is required in this book. I truly believe that if you have struggled with emotional eating throughout your life then A Course In Weight Loss: 21 Spiritual Lessons for Surrendering Your Weight Forever by Williamson, Marianne 1st (first) Edition (11/2/2010) could be your turning point.
I will continue to blog about the lessons I’ve learned and the revelations that have come up. For today, are any of you out there ready to admit that being skinny scares you a little? Even though you want it really bad, maybe there is a part of you that is afraid of success? I would love it if you would share. We need to start discussing these issues together. I hope this blog can provide the safe environment for this discussion. What are you afraid of? What are you fears? I would love to talk it out with you. Leave a comment below.
(This post contains affiliate links. I never promote a product or resource of any kind that I haven’t tested myself and feel is truly a great help to our weight loss journey)